2017年4月16日 星期日
Saint dream
saint dream/pollywoo(2017/4/4)
when i have a dream of he cleansing face on my back, i sense him still need me with company, but i dont want him any more.he is a phantom around me, i have several of saint dreams because of his show up, but my brain told me that he never give me any presents such like travel together, or buy me a ring to praise me how good cooking i am doing to him, he just like a gangster on my soul that asking for more and more.but it shows how dignity he has to being alone, he is a tender lover that only in my dream.
my reality is very moral, but in my dream it is so lot of plots to write down as recording document to analyze, just like i am female Freud doctoring myself every night.tonight, i have a peacefully dream, that is beause of i pray for god to let me sleep without night mares, but tonight i have terrible dreams of my shadow, i take action to forget about it, and this is really very good to me, i need no signs to symbol my life any more, i am with myself all alone.
tour note/polly woo
i have been to so many places that are countless, i write down some notes about my memory, and i travel around taiwan so happily that those memory i cant forget.
(1)228park history muzem(228公園)
thus is a beautiful park, with a historical muzem in the door, when i enter it i ask myself why japanese authority wanted to build a western Memorial hall like this, may be it is out of heritage from Holland and Spanish power ruling, and it is as white as snow on each wall out side and in side.
there are some decorated pillars on the roof, and each corner has its special grace sculptures, they are Rococo style of old establishment that remain the atmosphere of classic so well, i observe it with my eyes of diamond, and i find out it is a real richful treasure that when i discover the structure of deep intentions, i can realize that this building is a luxury gift that colonial country given to us taiwanese, how cant we treat it like a heaven present, and protect it well.
(2)eastern velly of taiwan island(花東)
there are so many rice growing over the farm land, in the rainy day we go through the eastern velly,where there are breathing mountains with clouds covering around like fog, and the small house are almost white style that makes the mood of this field so fresh and bright, as we find out this quiet heaven as a neighborhood of the main jade mountain, i also see the purity of fore chilai mountain on the other side, the green gress of home is so lightly removed in my mind, that i will never forget the insight of scene.
(3)pingding old stream(坪頂古玔)
we walk through the entrance of pingding, and along the way with bamboo stick on hands, we climb the ladders of stone after a picnicking rest in the concrete bridge, we reach the dingshan bus station, but the time is still two hours away, so we come to the coffee shop and have a very wonderful afternoon, the farmer boss is so glad to serve us water and coffee, with lotus cookies and a holland old map of where we are in young ming mountain, we have a very enjoyment of time on marching in.
(4)dragon head mountain(龍頭山)
around the moshen blog, there is a broken dragon head mountain and stream over there, the sightseeing is very fabulous that i watch the touring bus go right down to the center of the stream, and then we run to the blog to drink a nature coffee and aiyu beverage, there is a empty alley along the blog, every school and house are closed, we cant find the culture of native life, for they all move to the citys, and never return.
(5)sainter spring(聖人瀑布)
there is a sainter spring on the final station of bus to the hiking road, i go to see the long clean spring that flowing down the river with huge stone on its stream, i sit on the sidewalk to wait for the return bus to come, my mom go to see the village in front of the station, and describe it to me, we meet a old female farmer who have a planting veges career on the mountain, we take the same bus to the mrt station, and finally we feel very content with this tour.
(6)ulai shopping and dinner(烏來)
we go to ulai to see the popular production and old street, and there is a small muzem of origional race, report living history and showing the life style of ulai people, the ulai river is so large that a long bridge is over the trouble water, we have a chat in the small dinning restaurant, eating some vege and chicken meat on the table, after the sun is set, the station is getting dark, we get on the bus by long line waiting, and in my mind i remember the coming road is so beautiful that we all get a marvelous time.
(7)small green pool(小碧潭)
we take the mrt to the small green pool, it is a place where roadside stand are all souround on the two sides of the bridge, the riding boat is renting for tourists to play, and i watch the lake with unspeakable mind, somehow the water is not so pure that it smells, i see the high price estate advertising is spreading all over the road, but i dont really afford to live here, so i left with a mindful memory that never feel like go back here, because it is a pollute pool.
(8)support north temple(拱北殿)
here is a popular place where people are all happily going inner and outer part of the temple, in the square lots of gatgering noise are processing, we walk around the heaven father's temple, it is hell buddha who stand on the supporting stage of the worshipping room.
(9)golden dragon lake(金龍湖)
the lake looks like golden waves on the surface, we walk along the wooden bank, the sunset was so beautiful that it colours us with the heat and sweat, the temple in the upper ladder is support rice noodles, because today is Buddha's birthday, the high building in the middle of the lake looks like solitude, although it is deviced with elevater, but seldom inhabitants come to visit the lake, maybe they just get tired of the scence everyday in the window.
(10)danjhon university(淡江大學)
the university is empty in the new year day, as we enter the school, we have to get the permission of the guardian to visit whole campus, after we walk on the literary major building, i found it so narrow in the class room that almost no pass way for students to get out or get in, how they made it, i dont know, perhaps the classic pathway of the
garden is where students chatting under the shatter of the long route of winding park, i sense the romantic air of red build dream filming around here that so nice.
(11)chuchen ceromony park(中正紀念堂)
it is a nice day as i go see a theater perform in the concert hall, i saw the lover drama of drum and mass singing together, the night was so decent that i can feel my friend sit in the front seat to murmur with my mind, he always wants to watch a performance with me but my mom is sitting next to me, so i can only enjoy and analyze the theatre with him inside our subconsciousness of communication, how glad it is to spent a night with my favorite one in such a hall.
(12)stream of fir wood(杉林溪)
the atmosphere is very fresh, the tree is so straight talk like jokestick, there is a blue dragon spring in the end of hiking way, and when we reach there we all wet and hot, it is the time when climbing mountain is so interest and fun, we get to the eye of the heaven and earth, where there is a stone on the wall look like a white owl head, it is so proudly that we climb the top scene and take photo on the facebook, it is a very meaningful traveling experience.
(13)xinglong park(興隆公園)
the park is like buddhaism atmosphere for the pool is springing beautiful and all kinds of plants are growing so well, the new built park bridge is like a pink rainbow that in the center of the pool, it arouse so many image thought about the moon elder who connect people's wedding red line, but since its just a traditional legend, the park is decorated by the mood of wonder land that we like to exercise a little around such kind of scene.
(14)green lake park(碧湖)
the lake is huge with beautiful scene of surrounding plants and sightseeing in the center, the birds come close the water and the lake surface is like waves of bible saying, it is very saint that i am moved by the white bridge and the under water, i have so good memorys with my lover by the lake, every time i run to see him, he never know i have no time to go around the lake, because i visit him behind my mom's back, i am afraid of being scold by her, and my lover, for i love them both, dont want to be unhappy about it. he told me the lake is a last purity land he guardian for me, i am very touching to see his kindness.
女性福祉
1
女性為了保護自己,多半活在自己的內心世界,以女性思想為中心,看這個印象世界,陰性的反應,和母系社會的權益,如何支配著男性的需求,這就是男女對治的煩惱。如果男女朋友合得來,就不會有許多煩惱,或麻煩,假如不相配,再怎麼條件好也是沒有用的。
2
世界寂靜了,只有我和我的靈魂,在沉思對話著,曾經擁有的,並不會憑空消失,反而更飄出雋永的香。一代新人換舊人,被淘汰的人,只能孤單過歲月,住悲慘世界的遭遇挫折己心,向過去的婚姻說告別吧!
3
愛是用金錢來衡量的,若是沒有錢,哪裡會找得到愛的施捨,女人就這麼現實,但世界也會翻轉,由女人來供養男人,這是眷戀,看上眼的付出,在愛情史上女人的愛都是浪漫情懷的展現,表示男人功利薰心,自以為是,其實這試探,是在探索男人的美德。
4
女人不要男人的世界,很多人都知道,男人吃盡女人豆腐,還剝削她,女人需要男人關懷,鬥嘴,回敬,但是很多男人不解風情,認為女人需要男人的錢,和登對的陪伴,曬恩愛,這只是初戀階段,進入本質之後,女人為了福祉設下戰場,給男人下帖書。
5
異性戀不好參,很多障礙,但是速食愛情不會消失,通常愛上一張臉孔的愛,是愚蠢的,但是年輕人們心甘情願,死纏爛打,只為了一張迷人的一見鍾情,這痴心妄想也是愛情生態的一種,只不過現在流行的是愛上一顆精心計畫的腦,聰明對付是為了愛的追逐。
奧妙之處
1
蒼生的心,本來就有清濁之分,因為業障浮現出來了,所以要淨化,就要互相扶持,互相砥礪,不要面對蒼生還頌押韻詩,讓他們覺得莫名奇妙的。蒼生分男女兩種,人鬼殊途,但是十界互具,餓鬼界也是要去折服的眾生之一種類別,不要恨鬼,他們也會示現神奇跡象,讓你有如處於奧妙之境。
2
因為有許多不同的機根,所以存在著各種法界,一切眾生修行人生大事,生老病死之外,還有愛情,婚姻,生孩子,孝親,賺錢等,社會大學修的就是這些學分,然而有些風雅之人,如文學家,就是愛修行知識,智慧,才藝,音樂,語言,烹飪,等領域的事情,奧妙的人生,多麼奪目精彩的成功標的,需要我們去參透了悟,所以從閱讀中親近善知識,是一個契機,人生還有許多學分可修德。
3
人生如夢,但是要看得清醒一點,將道德從頭修起絕不會後悔莫及,曾經被稱為幽靈人口,獨行俠,因為不相信人心的詭譎,現在好很多,相信佛友的說法,幫助,善誼,我再也不理會善良人士以外的愛心能量了,因為善惡分別是長期觀察出來的,真實不虛。
4
連續劇教人學習正直的心,將不負他人的愛情修得完美,圓融,女角的重要性,遠遠高於男角的創造性,因為女性思維模式,是一種窮究戲劇的追戲人想要懂得的心曲,我們暫時稱她為主軸人物,因為女性不易懂得,所以奧祕就存在心理的執著當中,若能瞭解每個女性的心靈律則,則天下不亂,反而太平昇平,因為女性已無冤屈可訴求,光明的戲劇性決定了一個女主角的前景與希望。
5
至人無夢,現在我終於體會,眼神裡面有慈悲和體貼,對人事物心懷尊重,忐忑,珍惜,人生緣遇本是一場充滿冒險的流浪,能悟出生命真理之行旅,才是豁達面對自己的寫照,不假他求,一扇門開啟了又迎接你,邁向更順暢輝耀的人生路途。
小夫婦/吳菀菱
1
我和夢中婚姻的老公,合組一個理想同居的生活,沒有背叛,但有蒼老作伴。一頭白髮婆娑,滿臉都是層層包裹的善意,但是時間過得太久,一下子就變成小嬰兒一樣的肉身了。我們荒老了又樨幼,互相扶持,不會再心痛的偽裝不愛彼此,因為這樣才是肉身不會腐朽的方式。
2
我們都不懂夫妻之間為何要爭吵,要求,計較,但是我們都做了這樣的心想,也曾埋怨對方,不瞭解自己最愛的習慣。我們活在沙發上,被榻上,卻離浴遠好遠,一起聞著對方的腐朽味。
3
曾經我們是那麼年輕,現在竟然要比較誰才不老,不怪,互相糾結在彼此相愛得更加深刻的臂彎裏。在深沉的睡眠呼吸裏,尋覓對方有可能醒不來的危機。
4
我依然愛他,只是不讓他碰我,因為這樣子才是符合老年人的王道,成熟穩重的模樣,無有色情慾望,只有衰敗的時間。據我偵查,老公把我最愛煮的火鍋吃到飽,拿到街角開餐廳,這樣他可以時常去吃,不用花費鉅大食材菜錢,還可以賺溫馨的錢。
5
我常跟他說格言,但他聽過之後就不理會,說我是婦人中心主義思想遺毒。我才不管,我要想什麼就想什麼,他聽得到我的潛意識最好,我又不是不會吵架,只是隱忍罷了。
6
老人聚會得老成的積習,這真是個歡樂的世界,偶而鬥嘴,偶爾講道理,只要覺得花草也可以進食,我雖時都可以遠行,但是遠傳那太多錢了,開心受上當一次的乖。
7
今天你還我一件最輕薄的紫外套,因為我昨天打給你,你不在家,我知道妳管理我的衣服,像一個貼心老公的嫉妒心,你喜歡這件套娃裝,所以我也心領神會的給你留言,因為愛還存在,我提起信念,來為你寫作,為你爬格子。
8
我們在王國教會那裡,一起守護曾曾孫的出生,我們要活這麼老耶,我心愛的老公,我覺得你真的有疼愛我喔!
9
也曾什麼好處都索討不到,也曾不知你在忙些什麼,只知道你擺脫我的纏繞功,破如來之糾纏,已經心神忙亂,不知如何逃避。
10
亂講一通的世界裏,誰才是正常的,這問題果真很難評準,但我只要自己的心境沉澱下來就好了,不要太過於亂想,我想要知道跟老公一起靜坐的深沉禪味,是怎樣的關係,所以就開始坐禪念經。
11
一起躺在床上聽雨,雨滴像開花時的顫音,一聲聲打在屋簷上,好似水幻交響曲,擊落一串一串針陣的點陣圖一般,讓人聽得無量快意。
12
我給老公一些細瑣的吻,他說讓我來擁抱你,好愛好愛他,我們著衣互相依偎,但是話題又來到了沒有錢的悲哀,我覺得很難過,心裡頭也希望有很多錢來彌補我們的窮酸,我吃了他買的鹹魚翻身,於是心裡一陣酸楚。
13
他不許我去華嚴宗旁聽,求一本正經回來,評論他的雲遊詩集,所以我知道他關愛我,不讓我去拿什麼獎金和免費吃齋的修行利益,因為他不讓我出家,要我修好一張美妻的臉孔和心地。
14
我的煉語術太紛雜了,使我覺得對不起他,只要我一心對他忠誠,他也會跟著一起純潔的說話,毫無隱瞞和隱藏,我想像這就是一種夫妻之間的善良禱告,彼此都聽得見的坦承。
15
睡眠之間,我夢見了一個外國人,錯把他當成老公來愛,其實他根本就是闖進我夢境的小王,老公不知情,所以並不知道我們的對話,我很後悔,受到引誘而寫下方向街道的符號學小說,原來他就是一個職業小說家,是來探測我的寫作方向的。
16
我沒告訴老公,這件事,因為這是不忠貞的行為,我恥於啟齒,於是把夢忘記了,丟掉了,我跟老公說要努力學英文,他說一定要讀報給他聽,於是我讀了洛杉磯報給他聽,他很高興。
17
老公打了我一巴掌,我問他為什麼,他說我夢到外國人,他不曉得那是他的變形,本來是夢到白衣老公的,後來他卻跟我說起英文了,還要我寫一篇名叫方位街道(direct street)的符號學小說,老公說原來他變成光頭的老外了,所以就不生氣了。
18
老公很高興,我整個下午都在夢空氣,他給我熨燙背部全身,弄得我好熱,他說為什麼姚秦國王的老婆長得不像我,我說自己化豔粧,於是他就滿意了,還給我貼身護衛一般的濃烈愛意。
19
我老公很相信我,我也很誠實,因為兩不相騙使我們感情更加濃厚,深密的融合在一起,我們的夢是互相連綿的,他可以知道我在做什麼夢,而且他也可以一直睡我,像在睡一個長得像充氣玩偶的我,為了補回所有我們遺失的愛情劇碼,他一直睡我。
20
我的老公很相信我說的佛法輪迴,他真的為了我去創價學會開會了,我不知道為什麼他這麼愛我,好高興,因為跟第六天魔交易救父親的事,他已經知道了,就去參佛事,這個二乘所信仰的創造宗教,我也知道我們身為作家必須活得幸福,所以就加入了。
21
我在雲裡呼吸空氣,找不到老公來入夢,但是我寧願這樣補覺,因為我知道老公正清醒在振筆疾書,我給我們對對相配,在每個擅場的偶像身上牽紅線,但是他嫌我是一張美麗的皮,而沒有頭腦,有何辦法呢?但是我寧可還要三隻小豬的輪迴。
22
上次去看老公,帶了千里迢迢的禮物,他不讓我進門喝一口水,我這麼辛苦的遠遠跑來看他,竟然這麼無情,深怕我們乾柴烈火,在房裡做出不可見人的事來,我生氣,就拿回送他的胡椒餅乾,在回程的公車上吃得意猶未盡,一口接一口,他說,天啊!我還沒吃過什麼胡椒餅乾呢!活該,這就是不讓我進去喝杯茶的下場,我接著說要他用元本山做飯糰給孩子吃,他答應了。
23
我的心肝,我的老公,我怎會把你忘記,去找新的戀人呢?這輩子跟你在陰間活得這麼精彩,怎會忘懷,而將一切都丟包呢?在情人的耳語中,聽見自己的重要地位,於是很歡喜的,為他而安慰。
24
於是,我以為宗教是救人的,其實是斂財的,一直以來,我的迷夢在徬徨中認為因果是絕對,但現在卻不太願意接受果報,直到反省過後,才認真面對虛的果位,我想要知道報應是否不爽。
25
我老公找我找得好苦,在夜晚的公園裡,再三的來回找尋,我的蹤跡,他認為我一定會在涼亭下面等他,所以苦苦的覓尋我的影蹤,那一個化成少女的我正在翻他寫的書,我飄然跟他回家,他為我洗澡,為我催眠,隔了一夜,我又在床上消失了。因為他愛上了我美好的靈魂,而不是催枯老朽的肉身,所以他不願來我家接我回去,卻去公園找我的魂魄,真是奇詩人的怪癖。
26
今晨,得到他的雪燒仙貝供養品,歡喜的去祭拜佛,聽到彷彿心爽脆利的聲音,他希望跟我一起去旅遊,我也這麼期待,但等念完經之後,我拿起來吃,真是令我太喜歡的滋味了,我心歡喜。
原來昨天包的韭菜魚羹壽司,他們孩子嫌難吃,所以雪燒是鹹的味道,我會心一笑,不予理會的決定不再吃這仙貝了。
27
我竟夜安然,無夢,只有幾隻小動物,在身旁現出影蹤,躺在床上休息,這也是個不錯的陪伴,只要祈禱,就一定安睡。我不愛孩子,卻跟其他小寵物一起彌補睡眠,這真是不好的示範啊!
28
我繼續假寐,他竟然動手動腳的揮舞,好險是在夢境中,他後來又來熱身安慰我,安撫我,我們因為這樣子,像水深火熱的一對情侶,而不是成熟的夫妻關係,我想就這樣忍讓吧!容耐吧!反正只是假的夢境,不是真的打架。
29
我很喜歡他意味著,你知道我已經很投入的意思,我們為了生殖器吵架,他說我都不潔淨身體,讓他歡愛,我已經不要性愛了,他也明知故犯,對我訓話,說夫妻雙方要好好地相處。
30
我看了張老師月刊,才知道許多夫妻都有性關係的困擾,我對老公的與取欲求,是一向全數接受的,但是有了護身符之後,我才從淫色裏脫身而出,沒有感覺的過著擁抱空氣的日子。
31
老公要我煮飯,要我賺錢,可是我都想不出更好的辦法,我只有用更大的願望來逃避現實生活的危機,我還想要買一件新房來做生意,真是太妄想了,其實我只想全心全意的為他念經。
32
我忘記低潮,擺脫毀滅,換成有關世界會比較好的光明想法,其實哪有這麼好的事,黑暗它一直在移植蔓延,如何用精明的腦,來改變這個衝突滿佈的地球,我不敢再看下去了,因為可怕。
33
我們都在互相說謊,互相欺負,互相剝削,然而清醒的頭腦讓我們心平氣和,無有恐怖和恨懟,因為生命永遠值得祈禱。
34
因為你的不信愛情,使我認為愁恨,或許是世上最多的,糾結的秋紅。(完)
雲淡風輕/吳菀菱(2017/4/14)
1
一切善事都隨風而去,但是卻使劫難一一化去,能夠與你相戀,是一件極為滿足的幸福夢幻,我稍給你不用回音的信函,表示我在記憶中愛著你,不必回報,雲淡風輕。
2
愛你的小耳語,那些小說裡不會找得到的溫馨,我們療慰彼此的孤獨,像一對健康的靈性夫妻,有什麼話就坦白說,雲的自由,我們都有這種風格和習慣,我們是一體的。
3
你塞給我一張住址,這是你窩居在蝕岩區的房子,我回家後找到了這張紙條,並未攤開來看,我答應你,會寄信給你,打電話給你,但是這個夢裡面,我們已分隔兩地,妄想在你那裏開咖啡店,辦詩刊,根本活不下去,所以我寧可睡過去,將手心裏緊密握住的紙條,握住你那考驗我的問號。
4
神通,是一場戲,他帶引我走過,排演過,我卻失去了演下去的慾望,我不愛他了嗎?他抱住我的肩膀說,我好愛你,還掉下眼淚,可是,我卻覺得沒有辦法搭車前往那個禁區,繼續愛他。
5
家人全都反對,不讓我們在一起,過了今年會怎樣,誰也不知道,放開手,讓愛自由,因為這樣的感覺,畢竟是無可奈何的,現實世界中的任何緣故,都支配著我們的共同命運。
6
我在書房裡,翻譯著他的詩,已經無意義了,因為他人已不在身邊,那些跑得很開闊的散漫字眼,根本不是他的風格,我翻找不著自己的影蹤,忽著就感傷了起來。
7
是該結束了,這個搞花邊的詩人,把我在夢裡擺佈,任意謊言欺騙,我醒了之後,發現跟他在一起,根本不是幸福天堂,於是我打算去把誓言拿回,跟他訣別。
8
在溜冰場,跳著單人舞,雀躍不已的感覺像小說一樣的節拍,奮力的跳起美姿,這首曲子是在唱看電影情節而哭泣的心情,我卻怕他聽懂,我的心殤。
9
你在一旁看著,距離好遠,我曾聽過你說過上萬次的愛我,現在我覺得這是上蒼在安慰我,假裝你很愛我,其實我也知道,這世界只有美人才會被愛。
10
沒關係,我還過得去,承認自己的生活裏頭,有愛是極樂,有歡樂幸福相隨,我是最美滿的女人,今後也要獨立自主喔!
11
若我長成你愛的最初面孔,我還能慰留你的心嗎?或許你會害怕我變成了三姑六婆,但是我不會的,因為我很清白。
12
我希望能在碧湖劉三娘的表演會場,再見到你,你跟我約在涼亭見,我們相聚在一起,共談心事好嗎?我一心相許,你竟遲遲退卻,我們還有機會再敘敘舊嗎?
13
心間常思念的你,是否陰奉陽違,我常思及,你一顆小王子,恆久不變的星辰。
14
我寫好玩的,這份心愛的感覺,只為了自戀,請你不要記得我,我會向著陽光,輕輕把你忘記,不再憶想。
15
既然你已經有了心愛的人,我就放開你,我會去參佛,參法華經的經典,我就是一個迷信的佛教魂。
16
生活是俳句,人生也是如此,一句短言就論斷了絕對的定義,既然你內在世界裏沒有我,我也會繼續單獨活下去,以求安心。
17
除了愛情,還有更多可以追求的,像興趣,抄經,繪畫,書寫,等等,我可以竟夜無夢,像一個洗過惡夢的人,賺得每一天。
18
幸福有多可貴,當你失去,才知它的曾經存在,別上當,讓我們一起向大道走去,追求幸福不軟弱,珍惜你眼前所擁有。
19
當我什麼都沒有,只剩下謊言,我該面對現實的自己,去懺悔,去反省,當我只剩下你的謊言,我希望這是最後一次。
20
你拿了錢,就對付我,要我輸得很難看,那是真的很殘忍,但我相信老天會保護我,因為我是善良的,不存惡念的。(完)
鳳凰彷徨/吳菀菱
1
我曉得你不是那種人,可是你的靈魂不願被我鎖住,就逃跑去找別人講了,我想起你的這種狀況,不禁懷疑男人也有異屬性。
2
三天了,我沉浸在幸福中,沒有你的想像影子,我還要繼續走下去,新生的靈魂會帶領我,走向全新的生命狀態。
3
我數落著一磚一瓦,一草一木,好像你曾經走過這些景觀,這些場地,我是你手挽住的那一半嗎?是另一半的靈魂吧!
4
你沉默不語的看著遠方,向我的揮手示意,瞪了幾眼,好可怕,我只是一個暗戀你的女人,不能也不會把你怎麼樣。
5
馬路上都是金磚,這只是比喻人們愛逛街的想像,誰不知道任何地段都有權屬,人也是,都是人們建造起來的神話構築。
6
我的看法是不對的,勢必是要被刪除的想法,因為重生,我把過去遺落在空中,任人們看不見,卻呼吸得到,那就是愛情。
7
念及自我深處的反思,我向上蒼重頭開始祈福,什麼願望才是自己最高至上的幸福所及,我當向此發願,然後緣必定到來。
8
發現真相時,那迷蒙的眼,像是一對比目魚的瞳孔,幾乎要鬥雞眼了,真嚇人,我相信這就是所謂的,認真態度。
9
我必須面對前途了,把你甩掉,不去想不去管,只為了自己的未來而努力,我必須把你放棄在看不到的盡頭,這樣我才會死心塌地的把你忘記。
10
悲劇還未了,喜劇就開始上場,我將心影上的你,烙印在窗花上面,彷彿是一朵鳳凰花,嫣然燦爛然後墜落在地。(完)
柔情似水/吳菀菱
1
我要你去安個平安燈,光明燈,你答應了,為了讓你前景更好,我為你祈求順遂的人生,跟我到老都引起社會轟動。
2
我的聖堂身體,又答應今夜與你溫存,紀念這無法深愛對方的故意,我們寧願要在肉身不直接互擁的時空,持續的愛愛,這是我們陰冥歡愛以防止老天妒忌的方法,我愛你一如往昔。
3
在客廳看書,沉思書中的學術文字,這部深奧的權威書,使人深深的被吸引,論述也是一種哲學的研究方式,是純潔的夢。
4
我想要保持一張美麗的臉,姣好身材,以向你索討一個吻,一個擁抱,和一個手牽手的浪漫情懷,你會讓我圓夢嗎?
5
我們的衝突,矛盾,無奈,怎能一夕之間就釋解,我們這一對行走在天涯的小夫婦,怎麼樣也分不開,拆不散,因為我們是一體的,編織了一整個人生的相許故事,我們都互相獻身,無悔。
6
或許我們本末倒置,但是我們活在小神話裡,抱住幸福的尾巴,期望透過各種方式,守住我們的家庭,孩子不懂我們的愛戀,認為我們不道德,可是我們年輕的心,還要很多情慾來滿足。
7
當個小父母,多麼窘迫,難堪,我們真的沒有孩子聰明伶俐,他們心裡想著自己的喜好,卻不孝順我們的心思,我好怨歎。
8
老氣,不必擔心人家的眼光,因為許多人們一樣的悲哀,塗炭的臉,沒有朝氣,我只要心裡自由自在,理解你的善變。
2017年4月5日 星期三
My reseme
my english reseme/pollywoo
my name is polly woo, i majored in english in province university and Fuji university, i start my thesis writing during freashman and it is about advertising image of female right column in newspaper, and also the fairy tale of alice in wonderland and in mirror analyze theory about sexuality, it is a personal colum in taiwan li post when i was twenty years old, then i concerned about aids issue very sincerely, so i start to collect informations of english data to make a long reaserch report on sex in my novel of colourful painting(秤彩繪), i love to listen to english songs and study western theory about psychology of male to understand what they think about in mind, and to study many feminism project to fullfill the society need of female right, i write 13 more english books of 3c novels, to prove that in technology world there is still exist the Buddha theory and belief. my recent work is working on after written 100 chinese theory,novels and poetry books that are based on buddhaism of nichiren shoshu, i believe my grammer and writing experience can help and tuter cramp students to reach out futher accomplishment of success in their future life and diploma, i would like to teach every knowledge to them to make them more smart and intallengent.
2011年 一直在繪製後現代書法和書畫的作品,累積二十年作品最後拍賣給更生畫廊。
2012年 成立「文化評議」雜誌創刊號。
2013年 完成「吳菀菱佛法小說全集」電子光碟套書十二片,「polar」英文小說碟片大補帖,「dear rose」完成後涉及假自殺事件,「馬太太福音」「app」(魔術方塊)小說相繼完成,開啟「善的日誌」部落格。
2014年 完成「流蘇生活」佛詩集,印製「靈感」散步詩集,以向明老師的作品為封面,寫出宋澤萊老師所言輕音樂詩的前奏。
2015年 完成「當發大願」完成,續印「佛性自由」善書,「我愛唱歌」(嫁妝)「太極滿灑」小說集,並歡喜贈閱大眾。
2016年 完成「覺照叢林的美學欣賞」「金色流雲」和「日正當中」等詩論集,寫完「電腦搭檔」科幻小說,去黑龍江省旅遊,寫完「美的詩簡」旅遊詩集。
2017年 完成「法華經典」詩論(慈悲佛),「社務諮議」痞客邦小說網,「poetry trilology」「warm laugh」「why jet」三部小說,並在「從容文學」四月號發表「懷思漫漫」一文,出版完四十多本電子書和「文化評議」雜誌之後,今年預計要寫作「真愛的最後一片淨土」情詩集和黑龍江旅記「綠得極致」以及「小夫婦」小說。
2016年11月21日 星期一
Poet mind
Poet mind(to continue)
I search the net to find beauty shop service,and it is very near my home,i do planting eyelashes,fake hairdo,beauty face procedures,cosmetic make-up and fingertip colouring,it takes 800more nt dollars,i go back home and show off in itergram to be a model writer,post my photos to this app,but the poet lover complain me that i am over materialism belif,i think maybe i should give him romance letters with perfume on them,what will i write,i figure it out,i should record my diary about us to make him happy.
That is what i will do in this novel,i start to open my paper to write,when i am going to sleep last night,i find out my tongue is hurt a little,it must be you who give me turning kiss,which makes me spinning in the wound of tongue,i smile and sinking into sleep,my dear,i make up a story about renting a huge house of three floors,it is buddha giving to me,for i work so hard to do my writing job,i also rent a decorated place to exhibit my new poetry collections about love topic,i write it for you,my love,to let you know that my heart has always connected to you,no matter how i missed you,all i need is to pray to you,and then your soul comes to me suddenly,my dear poet lover,how i wish to givr you a present of expressing my works,to sign my name at that activity and introduce my story to the attending audiences,this dream i hide for so long,i just cant stop thinking about that we are now apart.i am very sad,do you know,my heart break stopped untill i write calligraphy letters to you,my dear,i hope you like it very hrarty.(1)
(2)my heart feel for you,my poet,you also write me secret poems to show your love for me,i love them very much,and i try to memorize them in my mind,but i can only think about a few words that i dont understand,i want to realize you,your simple fellow truth,your favour,your favorite deeds,i like to be with your classic interests,that makes me feel so romantic,do you know?my love,when i analyze you in between sentences,i know you are the one who knows me best,you are my angle of my soul,i must return you my thanks to you right away,for i will forget if i dont quickly do it,i might lose your attention,i guess.
(3)i wear each and every one dress,to let the hired photographer take my pictures,just to represent myself on the road of literature image,i take it seriously that a writer should not tell lie,not to cheat,or steal other's idea to make self famous,i will despise those who said that they have husbands but unmarried,have sick sisters but cant tell the name,it is a shameful talking to hide sex tendrncy in front of readers,my poet lover did the same,he cant tell his wife's secret,but announcr that he has experience of marriage.another shameful law is more mean,it limit literary writers to have any sex or marriage,it is a lie that he sadly believe in that law,but as time goes by,he write and read to play time,but not kill time,not like those who have a TV set and lost time sinking in video games which is cost high.he told me that he has no money,but he travels a lot,and eat gorgeous every day,i dont trust him,because i have a dream to show off my luxurious interest on acceserys,but he does not,he always dress ordinary and lesury outfit,which stand for his belief in eastern spirits.
(4)we have a mata son now being sent to new york home,to hide the danger that if students find out his mother birth him at a postmodern dream,he will get boly atturtude from classmate,so father he sent him to live in buffulo village,whish him become a wonderful youth,but he seems think twice about his future,now i am dreaming about living in the future to br with my family happily,but he brcome a mean father to test if he can get any way to survive without his teaching.i can only be his next mother,because he wont let me know his whole life,his first marriage is ended by argue everyday,his wife turn face like turn book,make him very anxiety, he sent the only son to new york,and i am dreaming someday he will live with me long affection,and give me a peaveful life,his son like mars letters,talented at computer science,he get a blog for his father,and he read society psychological books,he want to go to europrran to study MBA,i wonder if he has very excellent language talent,so i worry about him while his father says that he is not my son,i dont need to treat him well,i am angry about this,i tell him today we three are sepretated,it is so lonely, but i believe he put my dream birth son away,throw the new born baby to the garbage can,i am unhappy but it has gone,i must face the truth,never imaging that his son is my mata son,i wipe away my tears and go on my work,i brlieve any people see my story will know a man dont want a baby from a frmale who has many failure love storys.
(5)Silence lover
He hides me from my messages
Only quest remain in the air
He disappear from facebook
To escape my trace after him
He is a strange mined male
With mature means of oppose
He find a way to live secretly
Wont let fans know about his life
He is like a mystery that attract me
But now it is in vain only dreaming can reach
His maybe attorance toward my wish
I hope he listen to me as a good friend
But he love quietness much more
So i cant disturbing his living
Only watch time goes by
With my searching plate wasting money
Let it be i think and i say to myself
One day he will face me
my brand new face of beauty
(6)peaceful role
Today i am a quiet worker
Try to email and know friends
Every mrssenger is kind and nice
When my request occurs
The response get me satisfied
So many friendship and friendhood
I like to have creative discovery
Such as people give a report
On those literature knowledge
That i have never know before
This is a teaching lesson for me
To find out detail art of good minded
I love to be peaceful with this world
Where love is all around and working
My life is a Festival of pleasure
The texture of having enjoy and fun
I will be a role of believing faith
To get more adventage of survive
In the circle of globle village boom
(7)Rhyme
Give me an easy reason
To prepare all my fortune
Let it be my tolerate sun
Shining like a good none
For the noon is coming from
The truth of reading fun
I remember to sing a song
To make the cell phone
And i can ring down
Magic words of bublegum
To wisper sweetness on
Trusting His promise fund
My mind is like a moon
Somehow it rise in pain
Of course a night is soon
To become next afternoon
Day goes by with function
Time will be the only tone
In the holy of temptation
When godness mention
(9)The back
He does opposite
On my seat
To sweat
Like a rent
It is note
From boot
In the net
I walk on wet
For more tent
In front
I want
I foot
That is not
The ant
Walk and meet
But neat
Of meat
Is sent
Wait
Next pot
The right
Will write
To get
Final dont
(10)Rap sutra
My friend read quickly with me
The swift sutra long run till the end
My father lose a bunch of joss
It is a sign of getting much more gold
In my mother's spell it is a good luck
I watch a before lotus religion begin
The ceromony is very dizzy for me
All my wish is to get protection
From my holy buddha and lotus course
For the meaning of respecting sunshine
I truely get off all my bad deeds and tendency
In the future there will be a smart poem
Lead me and guide me toward the unknown
To make me not go in the shadow of cherity
Buddha is fullfilled by my recommend writing
Here is the wind of my shade of thinking
But my hair oh my hair will be falling down
Because of the monk holding on my doom
My lover is a poet with his book next to my pillow
Why is he absent in my long runing dream
I wait for my parents with patience
The answer is closed door in the action by hand
(11)Dry switch
I like dry kiss more than waterful kiss
The cause is no need to swallow
Mouth water of my due lover
I better like wet tea and cake
But who knows when he kiss me
With his wonderful tongue skill
I simple turning my heart like washing machine
Wheelchair, and a mind reading reminder,
I want to concentrate and fix on him
Afterall i sleep with a coughing sound
Murmuring sweet things to his ear
The dream is although unseen
My memory of his invitation is still
As a mother calling that shocks me
With a tender but ordering word
Please come back to my mind
I care about to seeing your true heart
If it is still longing for me my dear
Between mother and lover
Who should i choose to hear
The asking quest that both make me
Wanting to return to the origionality of youth
(12)After Complain
As i say long words to him
He slowly listening to me
I know i complain too much
While he hear me buy a white dress
To attend a gathering sutra reading
I anounce that i dress for white law
But my heart think all about him
He love white dress most
This is my first try to buy white
I keep a conscious fate
To write a new art novel for him
Hope this is not the ending
Of our relationship and commitment
Because my love fly like a new bird
That just begin to learn to start his wings
(13)Key words
I read from the blackboard
A teacher write down key word thinking
A pattern of realizing the pc world
It is a brain war in the civilization
As i read between the lines
I understand why everything matters
Even ghost,game,genius or girl
They are all equal before technology
Where there is a meeting within our mind
There will be a wish starting to happen
That is why nobody refuse pc field
In this time of thoughts and philosophy
I will hold my way and give a strike
To win back all my failure and sadness
Because this world is full of lonliness
Only my faith of love stand for me
(14)Wake up
I wake up this dawn
With black kiss surround my mouth
Dont know why herb remains
Those powder i eat for skin care
I wonder if he give me lip stick of darkness
Should i treat it like a gift or something
Like punishment cause i scream
To him all my heartbreak last night
Should i thank god that morning
I get a lot presents of job chance
Such as one publishing co. Info book
And a series of booking magazine
And a contract of writing drama
I am so in love of dark and white
These chances i wont forget
That everyday is a big happiness
It is time for me to be gone
(15)my life is making stories and plots,to make novel and poem full of daydreaming kind of joy,dramatic is all i need in writing.that is why i dream a lot to have idea of shadow to write,my thought is just so aweful and complicated,that i cant stop falling into the big hole of psychology,i used to read a lot about male mind of three id and mirror theory,i like to discover what is the authority of role that play important in novel center,which makes female miserable, i pick the poetry critics to show my academic idea,in the way of reality and research method,i get a good result in publishing,and it should be thankful for all people who help me through the way of acomplish a book.
(16)Wonderful hug
He lick my neck sweetly,and hold me from my back,he gives me smooth touch with his banana erect in my bottom,it feels like heaven.he said that i worry that your dream goes without light,i tell him its better calm and dark for my dream,cause nothing happening to be frightened in the future,he stay no light with me,and he make my buying estate dream come true,i thank him a lot,for he let me have a reality to live my life,i can do anything with our dreams webing on the loving affair we have,i am happy if he is happy too,i ask for no more,just have sweet dreams with him,that is all i want,my dear,do you hear me?
(17)Flood kiss
He kissed me all night,with mouth water full of my lips,he looks hugry for the kiss,i promise him that if he help me publish my book,i will let him kiss me every night,that is the vow i made for him,and he is satisfed too,how nice is that kiss he gives me,i like it very much,and he sink his face deep in my back,moving around the bone and meat,his tenderness makes me feel sensuality of pleasure,because i love him,i make him to become my king,this love is life long,and i would not want to change,but i wish him treat me tender forever,never say lies to me,and i will continue loving him by vow.
(18)Beautiful ring
I have a yellow stone on my ring,i get it from my love,my truthful husband in china,he watch me give birth to a baby and died,it is a hard birth,i cant make it in my dream,untill i saw him in the road selling stones,i realize this is my one lifetime in china with him.i have told him that i will be back by a transparent ghost around him,to guide him on the road of bearing our kid,he must sell stones to a sculpture talented person to make stone shine like jewelry, so that he can sell by higher price.that means a stone without chanllenge is useless,and worthless.
(19)i wanna live in his clean house,to become stepmother of his son,i wish to be a kind educater to him,give him smart suggestions,and ask a huge bed of one hundred thousand to sleep each day with him,i wonder if he see me naked on it,what would he do,the answer is he will be too shy and go to wash clothes, i know he can make magic of his house,just like a mind spell of magician name,it is a long name,but if you read that word in mind,every magic can be shown.i read the name too,i make a wish that he be frank that his room will always open for me,to let me live forever with him,even though to live inside his soul,it is to understand what he think and does.
(20)he gives me a japanese room to read sutra and study buddhaism and tea ceremony,i feel so glad but now it changed so fast,everything that ever decorate the room has been stocked in another empty room,it is all stuff that just to blind his mother's eye,because she wont let him get married,so he is very angry to stock all memories in the dust room,only white furniture remains.i read lotus sutra which is no easy matter to maintain the belief,i often get lazy mind not to worship the calligraphic buddha,because i always think i can control every wish i want to do,and by myself i can do it well,without any help if the buddha gives me obstacles or difficulties, i can still make it.
(21)His son called me ant,it suprise me,he live in the opposite wall of my table like a phantom,to learn how to paint calligraphic works,the poet lover is also as a ghost that come near me with a smell of dead body,i am so frightened that i should not brlieve the news report,it says my poet lover pull my dream born new baby and through away to the vege cycle can,i remember he said in my dream that he dont know how to deal with the new born baby,while i fainted with sleep,dont see if my baby is a girl or a boy,i am still searching the answer.if my baby become sience fiction baby,that has already exist for 16years,the poet sent him to hide away from the goverment pressure,i think it is very smart,but i am worried about if my son can survive long lonely life,i feel kind of undurable with my heart bleeding for my son,for the reason of unsure reason,he must call me ant but not mom,its alright,let's continue pretenting to show the whole world that even sifi has true affections in this society.i tell poet lover that i wont make him fell frightened about the pressure of government,because i am frightened so much too,we must stay secretly to make people find no clue to hurt our family.
(22)we also lie in today afternoon dream,to hide the secret of truth,prof the reality of being nice and kind in our love to son.we both know people are mean to talk gossips about us,so we start to go beyond the plot prople trying to change our happinesd,we are devided in three place but with mind staying together,never let others bolly to torture us all,especially those society speakers talk nonesense on TV,i get angry that they dislike my life style and narrative,i hate them to make me poor and get into their prophets, i know people love to lie a lot fortune about their family to make it come true,but it is not exactly the truth,when you believe it,you run into a foolish well that nobody will hear you,so keep conscious and smart,because people dont have the morality of being honest,if you do,dont tell them your practice,for god will know you most to give you the best quality of happiness.
(23)my poet lover tells me that he pay my cell phone bill already,i believe it cause today's phone call rings,and i catch it,this is a bank calling for the quest of loaning a village,i tell him about my financial situation,and he will return me a gmail or phone call,it is my way to fine my income get into my pocket,i dont want poet's money,if he test my love whever i love him or his money,i will promise i would rather earning money by my own,not to depend on him or his huge income of rant several apartments,i decide to be honest to my self,not to live in the shadow of nightmares,i believe in the sunny side of the truth,and i want to practice my ideology of wealthy wish,to make sure my life is successful but not failure.
(24)my poet lover gives me a dialogue of the pouring rain,while i tell him it is waterful joy that makes us glad,but should not feel the sadness of rainy day.yesterday i sleep when it rained,i dream about he visit my village,and he walk with me and son in the dream,we look like a healthy family,and i promise to look after his son if he cares about me,i would like to give duty and take adventage at the same time,i know he will make sure if i love his everything including his family.
(25)he gives me sm sex while i am being bothered by neighborhood, and just about to sleep in the morning,he tied my two hands,and i try to escape so i fall down the big bed with him together,he makes me remember his name finally and we have fierce sex during this morning dream,because i am sleepless and writing his poem critics,he is unhappy that i am not be with his dream,i tell him i cant fall esleep and i also drink a little coffee,after all i am in the dangerous sex with his anger this morning,it is hard to describe,for i never move and struggle anymore,he sense boring,so he swear never tie me any fever in the furture,i feel so glad and happy,for danger game is come to an end,i get his trust once again,i also get his gift of a can of tea next morning,i sent him my favorit tea ceremony furniture, i know he loves it very much about tea Festival activity,and i wish this year moon festival we can drink the same tea to cerebrate our due love,my heart is all with joyful thoughts, and i believe to give our son a job to design the new york house is a good for him,i also know our son is connected with him by line,i like to know more about this,he share with me all details,and i believe that our son will have a good time in the house of quietness and it is also comfortable for him to study and experience the daily life of no worry and trouble,i know my poet lover is loving our situation with all hearty hope,he wish us live separate to get to know each other more,i understand that he believe in god so well,so i want to fellow him as well,but he want me to trust my buddha,in the name of thanks.
(26)i write invisible love prose for him,i try to exist in the texture that no one see that i am going mad with the hidden truth,it is about how my fame influence the poet lover and his son,they are in my mind so much like to fake as my family,but dont know the temptation indeed,i face it every day and night,but the secret is unknown for the readers besides they two important acters,i want to know their past,and who is his real mother,while i try to cook for them,they seem like never taste mother's kitchen cooking for a long time,it must be my fantasy to have magic power to cook for them in long distance places that are seperated,if i am a creater of food,i would not be selfish to let them hungry,but i dont know if they like tradotional or creative food,i can rather cook by my own imagination but always feel lazy to cook,every tome i think about the trash from cutting gradience,i feel the trouble of recycle.but i know life is not eady in the age of high price socoety,buying things become a stuff of luxury, i am not feeling like to do it,all i depend is eating hot pot boiled noodles, it really save gas and cooking fee.i dont waste money but love to save money,we are all out of the same temper,we try to get through harsh days,but by my observations, poet lover seem to be a mean daddy,he never care about how his son is doing in foreign country,and he never want to get advenve with me,i can see that,but since i stop looking after romance from now on,i vow that i would never love others till the ocean runs dry,as i get old,i wont change face for any other romance no more,i completely lose faith toward male,i think they are centralized believers,and poet is a thoughtful person,he wont let me be his partner in reality,for he has experience the life of bearing a kid before he meet me,he wont want second kid any more,and i dont want it either,so i believe being single is free for us three,the first duty is to escape the eye of political judgement,which i am controled by eating sleepy pills,and taking psychological talk with doctor.
(27)i still believe poet is training his son to protect himself from pressure of politics,and he must do so to cover his poetry from being destroyed the poetic eternity from ever sonce he write poems,and he must stay famous and justice to keep our relationship normal like normal friendship,for he has no wish to have a notorious wife like me.
(28)i tell him that my eye colour is brown,and the story is coming from my grandmother's ancester,one girl falling in love with holand martian,they went to the grass and woods making love,finally the girl get pregnant,so my ancester got the partial blood of holand people.by my guess,it would be tuth,for my grandmother looks like white people in the skin,i am the same too,i can always hide from the heat of the sun,and never be tamed on my skin.so i am a far history hybrid which the story i make up is possible and i am good at western thoughts and knowledge,i am a taiwanese with holand soul,i think,maybe i can use DNA to test if it is real,but i dont know if the test can give me a more posific answer that perhaps many of my ancesters have intercoursed with foreigners,i wanna know.
(29)i just dream about to be connected with poet lover,but he wont give me wife name,i dream like crazy,after a long time,i go back to reality,nothing happened but memory remained,i am so independent that no body pay the bill for me,but only me needs to pay for real,i try not to spend too much money,and use bank bill to take over cash payment,it is a pleasure to visit bank so often,and i like the atomosphere of being serviced as a customer who face the bill each time through procedures of hand by hand,this is build on the trust between showing and appearing in the local counter.
(30)all the lie he told has been washed away from my brain,it is my stupidity that i believe poet is a person who never tell lies,but it is not in the shadow side part of him to do so,in frank world,he always tell the truth to me,as my best friend,i decide to take this love by subtitude of friendship,no longer to wish a wedding or a ceromony of marriage,i live peacefully everyday with reading his poetry,i feel content and satisfied,i like the ordinary life as a freedom writer once again,and i promise i will never fall in love with anybody in the future,keep quiet is what my mind will do,dont want to cause any trouble again,the topic about my novel has come to an end,i must remain smart to deal my life with happiness,i wish he is the same too,let me be generous and honest,to hope a better self in front of reader's eye,let me express the best of my sentence to show that love can be overcome in the wonderfull mind like heaven,and all people can be torlerate to live over there with all true heart.(end)
Poet mind
(31)i wrote love diary to him,but not expressed in the press,cause we want to live romantic life in secret that never being found out by fans,even thought my book is not popular,it is to be cherish in this lifr time,i know he decode to practice his vow not ready,but i am not worry,cause now i am like a princess under his protection,i write memory book of love sentence to him just to hold his heart,i love my son,i know he test my mother love toward my son,i want to give,so that on the future i can live a wonderful partner life.
(49)every time i think about how he feed milk to his kid,change diaper for him,i arouse a piece of graceful thank to him,my peot lover,he busy on every thing at home,he is a busy poet who use his hardship two hands doing home dutys,i thank him for bring love to son,and i think of his sunshine heart,i feel very like to live together as as a family,and i want to change my writing style,to write family warm plot living with him,i wish he can be my mate in writing,i would change for him,to be a very tender wife,we both are poet,and he want to write more in his career,never willing to help me or teach me rewrite my all works,i think if i want to be a nobel prize winner,my writing must pay hardship to resque my crisis on thriller gener,i want to keep the origional texture in the history,because the romance i wrote is recording male's bad side of charector,and it is a good education to male to change their badness,and also for female readers to prevent male pressure on them.if i write healthy mind in the novel,everyone knows it is wrote for the book market,which everyone can create it as normal logic,but i vow from now on i will discover people's goodness and helping kindness,i want poem not to be sour or blam others insperation,but shine the greatest value that people have in their essence.
(50)after i wake up this morning,i realize what he says is a lie,he want to give me erotica dream,but i dream about other things,i should know that heart hurt is due to forget to eat pills,i eat and sleep,after one night in my nonesense dream,i found out he want me to change literature works,is to put pressure on my shoulders,i think why not just put it on,let them show by the origional face to the readers,it is better way to express that all men are selfish,and they are hard to please,too.l know poet is also the kind of male,just he speaks before three times of think,so i try to dig his history of his aweful life with his extra wife,it is very under hell,she turns face like turns the pages,so they usually fight for small qurrals,and never get peaceful life for there is no money,he like to decorate the house with red stuff,but after since mother past away,he start to stay white and clean,can you read his mind from this situation,i think his mother maybe not let him marry,and so he is married with only coexistence of living together,it is a myth that i found no trace about their marriage but only a kid,the other kid she born for the air is losing direction right now,because she is a bad girl and she never goes to school,or has any thing to do,live no where,for she is nothing but a actress on the show of new book exhibition.
(51)i tell him,if the ghost kid is disposed,let us feed her to be our kid,and he sign with a long breath,why you do so to making trouble,she wont treat you right after she grow up,she has a selfish mind and never trust in love,i know,but what if people ask about his daughter,how can he say,i am worry about her running in the phantom air,that no body treat her like a real,thats why i want to adopt her,but do you think she will called me dear mother,save that,she doesnt even respect her father,how can she respect me,i know this is a problematic situation,that i am over minded,for he wont worry the ghost daughter a bit,why me worry?just it is sad to see her growing in the air without a birth day,it is so embarrassed to see him being scared by the suddenly showing up daughter,to make him fallen into her tricks of let him wound,hurt,worry,and bother,i want to make a spell before the buddha that she gone with the dust,never bother us this life,for we both not love her as a pearl on the paw.
(52)she never flatter me or his father,we both cant get the warmth from her,and she is stubborn that she live in her own way,be living with her mother's new husband,that is the only way we thought to make up the tragedy.because she looks not like anyone's kid,so we all dont know where she is coming from and where she will go to,we put the problem aside,never care,and poet live with my soul every night,he fainted in my body perfume and strange shape,i give him surrealism appeal and nervous touching, and he feel the softness in my soul with gental mind without no vicious ideal and attamp.the full moon makes us happy,and it shines every lover heart,to be the mark of celebration.we sleep all night long,with soul flying in the wind,we both cherrish each other's love,because the several dates we have,we come together as soul mates,and we are parents over night,but how kid come out of the womb safely,we barely have no idea.the secret is that his mother catch up with the son when he is disposed on the street years before,no body knows that she is a big buddhasattva in lotus sutra,in my consciousness, i know that she very earnest to be a grandmom,but the blood is unknown,for we all afriad of sent him to test DNA,we keep ourselves in the mist of family affections,just to enjoy more peaceful life without any changeable result.
Poet mind
(53)i know poet will finally in the end of the story going to live with his son in new york,never tell me the address and not to carry with me to that house,although so,i still traet him well,i dream about living fairly and sweetly together,share mind and seldom making love,for he is quite old,i must keep pace with him,tonight he have nothing to eat,just some veges in the refrigerator, i cook for him,hope he wont feel hungry with living alone,dont care about daily life,i say thanks with him each time we kiss,we are soft mined person,never fight to each other,only some jealous affection arouse sometimes on my mind,he always goes attend activity he like,i have no smart departure to get there,so we cant have date together,he has a lot of fans in the avtivity,i envy him,love him,care about him,thinking about him,but finally he will abanden me going to american forever live there,i feel sad and heart break,but i must live alone with courage and faith,in this period of love,i smell the fly around my room,i dont want him bevome a fly chacing after my soul,for the ending will cost me lots of tears,i will dry them with peace and curing mind,i know guy like him will test lady like me what i want,after all i am a poor loser woth my face no longer pretty,and i like to be better writer than him,i wont lose my dignity before him,i will be a single for all my life,only dreaming wish fool me that i must to check out clearly,a man like him is a excellent story teller,who cares,i can create more excited storus.
(54)i dream a yellow rose feild i walk alone without throwns,i feel love is waving to me,just i dont want to wave goodbye,i hold him tight,no words we have said just to keep quiet conscious to cold down our fight mind,i rather think he is kind to me,but in the dream he always do games with me,i dont want excited love but romance word to word,but he dont keep his double charactor balance,so my nightmare talk the hint of our future,just like horoscopes, i know poet are crazy but he is traditional one,so i want to live with him all my rest of my life,hope he give me as a surprise,i would be very happy.
(55)now he disappear in my dream,i cant dream about him,and long night i just travel in the old time of huge monsters flying in the sky,i lost in the forest and a small village,i ask a man how to leave this place,and get back to my home town,he says i need to fly on the huge bird's back and then get where i want to be,i think it is fairy tale,so i completely lost my dream,i stay in the bed without time and space moving on,it is quite strange that i wake up from the nightmare,i get to drink a cup of water,and then i go to the bathroom,i wash my face with less acnes on it,i go to the living room and write down this dream on the facebook,no wonder dreams without poet is so solitude,i really cant live without him,but right now he stop talking to me,just because he tell lies a lot,i dont hear him saying any more,for regret somehow i know,he never come to me any lonely night,and i know that he dont want to take me as i am,cause i am not a beauty under his love,he never loved me in the way i want,that is why i get old,i learn how to forget the dream,cause it is nonesense and representing that i dont love him the same way.but he hold me by my calling,it is a excited bus sexuality dream,this morning he is still sleep,but my murmuring get him awake,so he sink in the dream with me,what a coincidence that he and me loving so much by touching each other's body warm,we keep the dream so long,and never want to let go each other.
2016年7月10日 星期日
身心歡愉情詩集
<與你同活一百六>
我向徐福的廟祈願
要跟你一起長壽到老
活到一百六十歲多
像聖經裡面的後代
那樣虔誠不朽
帶著不再的原罪
通向天國的死即是活
因為我捨不得你
放不下我的歡樂王國
我們彼此守護
願這幸福能夠永恆
不老不死仙藥
我同你一起服用
就算像后羿嫦娥
我也要試用
因為我很愛你
不想讓城池凋敝
愛心毀滅
所以我要口含著仙藥
吻向你的嘴
不離不棄
<夢的A字型>
我在夢中被你紋身
成為一名清教徒婦女
A字的故事是我的懺悔
因此我上了審判台
你應該要原諒我
這麼愛黏你
我要的是形影不離
壞女人也可以寫詩
吐吐苦水不是嗎
何以你餵我以寧靜
在你的沉思當中
有沒有我的影蹤存在
起伏的心好奇的問
問蒼天問水手問你我
問天邊一沙鷗的精神
是否阿Q一般可笑
別讓我落淚
我落的是滿臉鑽石
這代價太昂貴
你可以A我
但不可以騙我
<借詩還魂>
我是一枝借詩還魂草
蕩漾在你的心旌
像雪山仙草
可以治活你的青春回憶
讓時光倒流
為了愛情
我可以睜眼說瞎話
或者不斷付出
但我不死心
不求雪山大士的道悟
我只求一起睡億千年
跟你同寢同眠
同心同靈同魂同體
像命命鳥一樣
同年同月同日死
也可以共生
一起心跳
飛相同的方向
一同恨別鳥驚心
你說好不好呢
我的通心麵情人
論佛
論佛
佛的神聖,在於放光,智慧無量,佛放棄利益,為眾生悟道,出離生老病死四苦,佛的戒嚴,非常謹慎自律,一個聖賢所應該做的,不離八風,不動三業,五欲,佛的法律,也是一國之奉守,要昌盛繁榮,則必修佛,否則國不興盛,人民不德,欲國運勢利廣播,則必奉佛為尊,子民之福必至。為求佛智,多著於相,探索空即為有之道,法必務實,法必報應,為人處事,必得真誠,道德,不得犯五戒,遊戲三昧,不得殺戮。人民為求實相,需放棄虛擬空間之幻感,吸毒,幻想,幻覺,為了成家立業,必先崇佛信佛,知道佛法報復不爽,報應力求世道現時,不得歪打正著。國民若當當國為佛國,則濟貧助弱,有所不為,有所為而為,仁義禮智皆備,懂得愛心付出,則舉國慶賀,大道行施,國無盜賊亂寇。
2016年7月6日 星期三
夢島嶼
夢島
我寄情於風,颱風來前徐徐的風,隨著電風扇,將我催眠,我的夢中有各種鑲上花紋的珠子,和滿天空的鑽石粒子,我用力的吸收,收集。於是我擁有了全部的珠寶,我被太陽阻止,說我太貪心了,所以我就醒過來,記錄這篇宇宙珍奇的夢幻。原來,我在夢前遭到拋棄,一個古江戶的遊園樂,對方送我五六袋的禮品,把到我以後,就始亂終棄。我去拜過他的雙親,這樣的夢,使我忘記了原來的戀人,我想,也許這只是他在擾亂我的忠貞而已。我把珠寶放在心上,身體力行的做一個富婆,我的夢在江戶有過輪迴,是一段不完美的戀曲,其實我是藝妓。風中有雨露,有落葉,有細菌,我卻喜歡吹風,因為我的喜愛,風兒也對我微笑,攀談。情人去紐約,帶著我的靈魂來到旅館,為我散落的腳拾荒,放在床邊,然後輕吻我的舌,直到兩片舌平衡的來到親密無間的關係中,我很開心的笑聲,讓他聽見,他又帶我去廣播節目,我聆聽他烙英文,真的是很棒,給他鼓掌,很快的,我發現他要聊我了,我便瞬間醒來,我想告訴他,昨天老師來切割我們的好感,七夕都夢不到他,雖然如此,我走到他身邊,導遊將護照摔向我,說你甘脆也跟上吧!我看你們是一旅兩人遊,分不開的情侶。沒了他,我就不踏實,因為他,我大哭了三遍,眼淚汪汪,足以灌溉枯葉,我覺得,或許分開是為了準備在一起的空間,所以忍耐,慢性子的推敲,他到底有沒有去紐約訪友,我已經一個禮拜沒聽到他了,我害怕失去他,但失去又如何,反正我已經不要別人了,我不求別的緣故,只要他愛我。我想到一個苦悶的想法,因為我是恐龍妹,也許他寧願選擇愛普通人,而忍受不住我的龍脾氣,若是他真心愛我,我可以修飾我的刺,我的凶猛,我就是紫鑲鑽,我的寶光,需要他前來鑽研。我害怕他的兒子對我凶,不聽我的話,我被他摔電話,真是丟臉,生氣又打一次,對他嗆聲,我的情人知道了,一直爆笑,說我還是別惹他好。
愛就是連他的家人也愛,愛就是永久守候,愛就是無時無刻的關心他,我相信,愛不是隨便施捨,而是珍貴的布施。我覺得他應該玩玩御龍遊戲,因為這樣的愛是服伺,是尊從,愛是獨有的,無上的,我的愛是最棒的,沒有人能趁火打劫。我有一個夢,性夢之前,夢到豬巴戒的禁錮,說明了我們快要七世夫妻了,別再繼續下去,我對牠做鬼臉,表示我不在意,這段感情,將錯就錯,不會回頭,義無反顧的前行。很有條理,有規矩,有義氣的他,卻不曉得,這樣的路即將拆散我們的愛,因為他的保守,我守住多少孤單的夜,忍受汗濕的夏天,沒能像他那種寒冷,我們一個熱一個冷,他堅持不要我為他暖身,誠懇的道德,說明了他的星座,是純潔真心的那種人,我好愛,沒法忘記他。他何時宣布歸國啊!我平版快當機了,因為前任男友正在推薦四G行動裝置,所以我沒法抵抗他的警告,我必須做出決策,不想簽二G的契約,也不要重灌,我有雙全法可選嗎?我想就不取消這隻號碼吧!總不能停止一只手機的監控,就結束一段感情吧!我簽署的終身約,要愛到老的,誰能分開我們兩,我跟他說,我愛你的溫柔,你的感性,我要與你廝守,私混,幫我想個辦法。如果我給你一億元,你就分五千萬給我吧!作為和平互助的利益愛情,我願意付出,只求你真的給我們一個前途,他說好的,我答應你,真高興。我跟他互相口交,我喉嚨痛,他卻沒事,我好弱,留在佛堂吃藥療傷,隔了五天還在咳,我不管現實多痛苦,仍然堅定所選擇,沒有畏懼退縮,我愛上了就愛到底,吾愛,我還是要守在你的身邊,因為你的思想高度,讓我清醒清晰,我就喜歡你這樣老套。<給羅曼史的歡慶>今天是七月七日七夕,我覺得平凡的愛就是最有價值的愛,那些明星比豪華,其實只是在炫耀,愛是相親相愛,永不分離。有了愛,什麼都捨得給,即使是打算交易,也是兩相獲益,只有犯罪的愛是失倫的,是禁忌,不能自拔。羅曼史真是迷人,有了羅曼蒂克,什麼事都被美化了,有愛就不會得癌,這是醫生的證詞,我也相信,所以一直在追求愛,我要健康的愛。相伴,就是最堅定的愛,不離不棄,綿悱惻,我敬祝天下有情人終成眷屬。颱風已走掉了,想必是被世間的愛給感動,自動離去,今天的颱風是愛的見證。人生到處是謠言,夢見一生的敵人,對付我的手法非常卑鄙,這封寫給明年的我的信,我希望明年就能擺脫敵人,敵意,敵方。我覺得若能大進步,何不躍一大步,不要被小石頭拌倒,大步一飛,可以前往天堂的成功感,多麼歡喜。希望今年的我,已經到達那最高點的尖峰,峰迴路轉,也不能將我打倒,我願接收今年的心願,成就滿懷。我想,活在快樂幸福中,將是我最歡喜的事,我要攀爬到理想的高山上面,高聲歡呼,喜悅叫囂,我成功了。我不要管任何謠言,我只要一心一意的孤行,作對的事,想成功的實,我要爸媽一起跟我享福享樂。我在今年期望明年,希望自己和爸媽健康長壽,共享福祿壽的歡樂,擁有一間房子,當做商業的基地,我要再次出發,寫一些更動人的小說和詩集,與詩友共同面對美好的未來。若能夠的話,我希望所有的作品都被出版,盜版也沒關係,只要發行,就勝過沒有出路,沒有出版,我要聲名遠播,我要利益遠播,我要自己的人脈更加的廣泛,有更多人聽說我,但不是謠言謠傳。我的下一部作品,會是經典,我這麼想像,期待,我要寫出大鳴大放的,大放異彩的作品,超越自己,更遠遙的心願。
緣份商機
緣份商機
若不是這緣份,我怎會在這裡懷念你,因為無緣無故,我們再次分開,分離,而跟親人形影不離。在夢中見到你的失落無助,我也同樣不歡樂,即使我們相許相知,也不能常在一起,共寢共食,只能互相打電話,無所不聊的談天說地,說心事。
我在光明商圈裡找到一個出租店面,我在賣衣服和首飾,為了與你相遇,我每天都準時開店,在店面裡等你上門來。看看你會不會買男用手錶,或買一些戒指送給女人,你是個不花心的男人,但是很多女人倒追你。我好怕失去這份緣分關係,我是個有多次失戀經驗的中年女子,我有姣好的臉孔,和魔鬼的身材,但你總是不受誘惑。我寄名片的照片到你的伊媚兒,你也不上門關照,只給我打個電話,恭喜我順利開店。我約你在商圈附近吃個麵,你說改天再說,要出國去的日子快到了,七夕可能不會在台灣過,我既失望又無奈。
我們都從商,是因為有讀心術,能掌握客戶和顧客的心理,進而達成交易,這種柔軟手段,在於人脈的建立,人情味的拉攏,無非不是一種化商機為友誼的手法。所以我們互相了解,互相欺騙,但是不致於互相傷害,由於你懂我,所以用心讀我,知道我家人的動向,所以你也作出動作,出國去洽商。
我的店舖叫億元寶物,我取自乾隆通寶的符號和名稱,使我的生意很好,財源流通廣進。我認識附近的商家和住戶,為了謀生而開創人際關係,我收集各式各樣的名片,交遊頗廣。你看到了我的長處,進而跟我交往,也投資了我的店舖,進口一些珠寶給我販售。
你寄放一些珊瑚,翡翠,紅藍寶石,鑽石,等首飾在我這裡,都不跟我逼帳或收帳,很明顯的就是要贈送給我的商品,以生意的名義,與我交往,我得到了你的心,真是歡喜。
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